When you believe in yourself, you'll trust your wisdom
and your strength. You'll trust your perceptions and
you'll believe you have the right to your emotional
and physical well-being. You're much more likely to
do what you need to protect yourself.
When I first wrote this, I wrote just "understand
reality". Then it occurred to me, almost like a
blinding flash, that many folks understand reality,
but don't really face it full on. Completely see and
accept reality and you'll be miles closer to being safe
and being in charge of your life.
We might almost say "Stay awake." We're all
often daydreaming, I think. Stay aware, wherever you
are, whatever you are doing. This is really just the
same as the idea of "being present" - leading
not only to being safer, but potentially to greater
enjoyment of the moment by moment experience of being
alive.
I now always say in classes, "If you ignore or
forget everything else I say today, remember this one
thing... If your intuition is warning you, there IS
something wrong. Trust it, and act to increase your
safety." That's how strongly I believe in the importance
of intuition. (Anyone who hasn't read Gavin de Becker's
book "The Gift of Fear" on this really should.)
Looking strong and confident makes you MUCH less likely
to be targeted.
One woman, after doing our weekend Intensive, ended
literally years of office harassment with a couple of
sentences. I don't remember exactly the words she told
us but it was something along the lines of, "That
is degrading and offensive. It's harassment. I don't
like it and no woman does. You - will - never - speak
- to - me - like - that - again." (All spoken with
100% congruence and the eyes of cold fire.) We have
heard so many times that a just a few words was all
that was necessary to end a situation, be it harassment
or potential attack.
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